shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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