After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
