As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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