You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Randomize
