One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Randomize
