I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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