Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The air was thick with penises
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Randomize