But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
