So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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