***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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