Welp...herpes.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
