drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
