walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
