I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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