i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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