Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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