it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
he's gonorrhea incarnate
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
