I need help removing her.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
