Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
