Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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