can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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