There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
