They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
