i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it