I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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