i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Randomize
