Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
You smell like stripper and shame
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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