come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Randomize
