barbara walters just said penis...
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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