Ambien. No doubt about it.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
