waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
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i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike