I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
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