Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
