With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Randomize
