She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
