i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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