Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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