morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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