we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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