I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
