I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize