you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Randomize
