I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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