I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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