she looked like the bat from fern gully.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize