Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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