The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Randomize
