I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I think my moral compass just broke
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