I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
