lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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