hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
